A few years ago I remember the looks of pity my friend Jennifer would get when she mentioned she'd been trying online dating sites. I must admit, at the time, I too thought she must be desperate. Couldn't she meet anyone in 'reality'? Didn't she ever talk to people at work or at parties?
I judged her actions and concluded that she was either a bit weird or socially inept. Of course, you know I wouldn't be telling you all this if she had never met anyone...sure enough, she met a guy online, they fell in love, and now they're married.
Even one experience such as this in your own group of friends can make you reconsider your hasty judgments. So, could online dating really be the answer? Or, is best to just stick with the traditional method of meeting people, even though it hasn't worked out for you yet?
Well, let's say you're busy all day at work (nobody eligible there), you go out a couple of times a week with your usual group of friends, and the rest of the time you're doing chores and sleeping; realistically, how many new 'dateable' people are you likely to meet?
Even if you managed to date, or even chat beyond pleasantries with one new person a week, how many of those are likely to strike up any kind of connection with? One in a hundred? At that rate, it would take a couple of years to even meet someone that you feel really attracted to.
So, what if you want to speed up the process? You do the logical thing and sign-up to a dating site that has millions of people in its database. Isn't it still a bit like shopping for a laptop on Amazon?! Isn't it less 'real' than bumping into someone at a party?
Is sending someone a message any less 'real' than saying it directly to them? Be honest, which do you do more of these days? Be even more honest, aren't messages and emails preferable when you're feeling a little nervous or anxious?
Chatting to a person you've never met before that you like the look of is hard! opening communication is way easier from behind a screen. No more nervous chat-up lines and stuttered introductions. You get to think carefully through what you say and ensure that you present yourself in the right way.
To summarize, a long time ago, online dating appeared to me like a last resort for lonely people. Now though, I'm convinced that it's surely the best place to start. Let's say you communicate with only ten new potentials per week through online dating sites - even if only one turns out to be eligible, you've increased your chances of meeting someone by over 1000! You can't argue with that!
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